Four thousand different MAGNATES, MOGULS & NABOBS are romping in my gothic solarium!!
Either God wants to abolish evil, and cannot;
Or he can, but does not want to;
Or he cannot and does not want to.
If he wants to, but cannot, he is impotent.
If he can, but does not want to, he is wicked.
But, if God both can and wants to abolish evil,
Then how come evil in the world?
I’m pretending that we’re all watching PHIL SILVERS instead of RICARDO MONTALBAN!
We used to laugh at Grandpa when he’d head off and go fishing. But we wouldn’t be laughing that evening when he’d come back with some whore he picked up in town.
- Jack Handey
I feel partially hydrogenated!
It was a sin to want to feel up Ellen. It was a sin to plan to feel up Ellen. It was a sin to figure out a place to feel up Ellen. It was a sin to take Ellen to the place to be felt up. It was a sin to try to feel up Ellen, and it was a sin to feel her up. There were six sins involved in one feel, man!
- George Carlin
He’s here to save the galaxy…